Girls Night Out

The other night I was invited out for a night with “the girls.“

I promised my husband that I would be home by midnight. Well, the

hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.

Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in

the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed

three times. Quickly realizing my husband would probably wake up, I

cuckooed another nine times. I was really proud of myself for coming

up with

such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict

with him.

(Even when totally smashed, three cuckoos plus nine cuckoos

totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I

him “ Midnight.” He didn’t seem pissed off at all.

Whew! Got Away with that one!

Then he said, “We need a new cuckoo clock.“

When I asked him why, he said, “Well, last night our clock

cuckooed three times, then said, ‘Oh. Shit,’ cuckooed four more

times,

cleared it’s throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed

twice

more, and then tripped Over the coffee table and farted.“

Lobsters

The basics: The cooked lobster pictured here is the cold-water Maine, or American, lobster, and it can be found live (and considerably greener) in lobster tanks in well-stocked super-markets. (The spiny variety of lobster doesn’t have claws. You’ll most often find its tail sold frozen.) And though shellfish does contain cholesterol (on a par with beef), the amount of saturated fat is trivial. Even better news: A quarter pound of lobster or crab-meat has only about 100 calories.

To cook: A frisky lobster (which is how you want them) can make cooking a horrifying experience. There are two ways to slow it down. A few minutes in the freezer will stun it, or you can try to “hypnotize” it. Hold one by the base of the carapace (back), where it meets the tail. Stand the creature on its “nose” on the counter and stroke its back up and down. In a minute or two, the lobster will fold its claws over its head and curl its tail. It’s out. Now toss it into the pot of boiling, salted water (enough to cover the lobsters). Cover the pot. When the water returns to boiling, cook one-pound lobsters for 10 minutes, adding three minutes for every additional pound. A 1 1/2-pound lobster, for instance, will take about 11 1/2 minutes to cook. The antennae will pull out easily when it’s done.

Dungeness and Blue Crabs

The basics: Dungeness crabs are from the Pacific Northwest; blue crabs are from the East Coast. Both are best boiled or steamed.

To cook: Fill the bottom of a two-part steamer pot with half water and half cider vinegar. Heat to boiling. Put the crabs into the steamer top; cover. When the liquid boils again, cook for 8 to 10 minutes or until the crab shells turn bright orange, with no dark red or reddish green patches. Pile onto a platter or newspaper-lined table and sprinkle with equal amounts of Old Bay seasoning and coarse salt (both available in the spice aisle of the supermarket).

Soft-Shell Crabs

The basics: Soft-shell crabs are merely blue crabs that have molted and whose new shells have not yet hardened. They require special handling. To prepare them, you’ll need to rinse them (alive), remove the triangular apron from the underside, discard the gills, then cut the front of the crab about 1/4 inch behind the eyes and squeeze out the small sack you’ll find there.

To cook: Dredge each crab in salted, peppered flour and saute in hot butter about 3 minutes per side.

Stone Crabs and King Crab Legs

The basics: Stone crabs are from Florida; King Crab legs are from Alaska. Both are, for the most part, sold cooked and frozen.

To serve: They taste best served cold with lemon mayonnaise (stir about one teaspoon of grated lemon zest and a few drops of hot pepper sauce into one cup of mayonnaise).

The Word of the Day for June 30, 2009 is:

oenophile • \EE-nuh-fyle\  • noun

: a lover or connoisseur of wine

Example Sentence:

Only an astute oenophile like Simon would know that 2002 was not the best year for that particular Barolo.

Did you know?

“It has become quite a common proverb that in wine there is truth,” wrote the 1st-century A.D. Roman scholar, Pliny the Elder. The truth about the word “wine” is that it goes back to Latin “vinum,” but it is also a distant relative of the Greek word for wine, which is “oinos.” Indeed, Latin borrowed from the Greek to create a combining form that means “wine,” “oeno-.” Modern French speakers combined “oeno-” with “-phile” (Greek for “lover of”) to create “oenophile” before we adopted it from them around 1930. Etymologically-inclined oenophiles are sure to know that “oenology,” for the science of wine making, and “oenologist,” for one versed in oenology (more often spelled “enology” and “enologist”) also trace back to the Greek root.

The Word of the Day for June 25, 2009 is:

desolate • \DESS-uh-lut\ • adjective

1 : devoid of inhabitants and visitors : deserted

2 : joyless, disconsolate, and sorrowful through or as if through separation from a loved one

3 a : showing the effects of abandonment and neglect : dilapidated

* b : barren, lifeless

c : devoid of warmth, comfort, or hope : gloomy

Example Sentence:

The landscape looks truly desolate in the winter, but when it blossoms in the spring, it can be surprisingly beautiful.

Did you know?

Something that is desolate is literally or figuratively “abandoned,” so you probably won’t be surprised to learn that “desolate” has its roots in the Latin verb “desolare,” meaning “to abandon.” The Middle English word “desolat” comes from the past participle of “desolare,” which in turn combines the prefix “de-” and the adjective “solus,” meaning “alone.” “Desolate” is not at all alone in this family of words. Some other familiar descendants of “solus” include “solitary,” “sole,” “solo,” “solitude,” and “soliloquy.”

*Indicates the sense illustrated in the example sentence.

I am going to give everyone that completes the questions correctly 500mgs.  The rules are there is no googling the answer, I want to see how you got the answer.  These puzzles are for your enjoyment, do them and you will have fun and get a prize. PM me with the answer.

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Seedmore Scramble

I am going to give everyone that completes the questions correctly 1 gig.  The rules are there is no googling the answer, I want to see how you got the answer.  These puzzles are for your enjoyment, do them and you will have fun and get a prize. PM me with the answer.

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A school teacher must schedule seven sessions, which are abbreviated M, N, O, P, S, T, and U, during a day. Seven different consecutive time periods are available for the sessions, and are numbered one through seven in the order that they occur. Only one session can be schedules for each period. The assignment of the sessions to the periods is subject to the following restrictions:
M and O must occupy consecutive periods.
M must be scheduled for an earlier period than U.
O must be scheduled for a later period than S.
If S does not occupy the fourth period, then P must occupy the fourth period.
U and T cannot occupy consecutively numbered periods.

1.Which of the following could be a possible list of the sessions in the order that they are scheduled during the day?
(A) MOPSTNU
(B) NTMSOUP
(C) SMOPTNU
(D) SOMPUTN
(E) STOMPUN

2. If session M is assigned to the third period, then which of the following must be true?
(A) N is assigned to the sixth period.
(B) O is assigned to the first period.
(C) S is assigned to the fourth period.
(D) T is assigned to the fifth period.
(E) U is assigned to the seventh period.

3. Which of the following could be true?
(A) M is assigned to the first period.
(B) O is assigned to the fifth period.
(C) S is assigned to the seventh period.
(D) T is assigned to the sixth period.
(E) U is assigned to the third period.

4. If N is assigned to the third period, then each of the following could be true EXCEPT:
(A) M is assigned to the fifth period.
(B) O is assigned to the sixth period.
(C) P is assigned to the fourth period.
(D) T is assigned to the first period.
(E) U is assigned to the sixth period.

5. If T is assigned to the seventh period, then which of the following must be assigned to the fifth period?
(A) M
(B) N
(C) O
(D) P
(E) U